Coming Home to Our Character

Posted on May 12, 2020 Topic : Inspirational/Devotional, Women's Christian Living
Posted by : Lee Nienhuis

When I sent the kids out the door on March 13^th, I didn’t realize it was going to be their last day of school for the 2019-2020 school year. I would have made signs for them to hold saying, “Last day of my Junior year!” or “Last day of Middle School!” At the very least I would have written a note to remind my daughter, “Please bring your glasses home. They will help while we homeschool.”

I’ll bet you didn’t know the day your kids came home for Stay Home, Stay Safe that your reality was about to shift either. We had no idea that families would be huddled in their homes together for weeks, if not months, alone with each other. All the activities that has us running at a breakneck pace came to a screech halt, and what was left was our confusion, disappointment, and a raw version of us that we may have been neglecting. Was this your reality, too? When the dust settled, I found that there was some work to be done in the climate of our home. There were attitudes and patterns I had ignored and neglected in our busy-ness.

Did you experience this whiplash, too, Friend? Have your spotted characteristics in your kids that you had simply passed over? Perhaps you discovered that your child whines-a lot. Maybe the discovery was that your teenager can’t function without a glance at his phone every 10 to 15 minutes, your girls may bicker in their room, your son refuses to share, or you blow your top when the kids are inconsiderate of your need for quiet.

To own that my child has a problem with anger, honesty, or her work ethic means facing the shame, guilt, and feelings of inadequacy as a parent. It is far easier to bury my head in the sand, run to the next activity, or skirt the issue. But what if we leaned into this season of slow and as parents own the problem in our families? What if we calculate the problem’s depth, try to understand its genesis, and do the hard work of uprooting it-teaching or reteaching, and training in new behaviors? The answer is we will gain incalculable understanding into the family God has given us, and we will know how to move forward toward the goal of a more Christlike family life.

The vast majority of us came home to each other and found there was some serious work to be done in the area of our character. It’s what we decide to do with these realizations that distinguishes us from the world. We cannot repair what we will not assess, and we cannot fortify what we will not own. Maybe, just maybe, this was the moment you have needed for a new beginning and what if you started with this simple prayer?

Lord,

I see signs of cracked character in my home. I’m so grateful that You are slow to anger and abounding in love. I confess I need your help to cultivate a life of character in the lives of the family you’ve given me. I need You to help me recognize warning signs, to see things I might miss, and to catch my child in praiseworthy moments. Keep watch over our steps, Lord. I need you to guide us all on paths of righteousness for your name’s sake. In Jesus’s name, amen.