Should You Be Concerned About the Music Your Child Listens To?

Posted on Jan 17, 2019 Topic : Men's Christian Living, Women's Christian Living

Most of us who are parents today listened to music in our youth that would have shocked our parents and that we’d be appalled to have our children listen to today. This may leave us conflicted and feeling a bit hypocritical about trying to control what music our own kids are allowed to enjoy. Ultimately, every parent has to decide where they draw the line on pop music. But we should not fool ourselves into thinking the decision is inconsequential. For better or for worse, your child’s worldview will be shaped by the music they listen to.

How then should we address the role of music in our child’s life? By focusing on a simple, broad principle: focus on the lyrics. By teaching them how to listen to and evaluate the content of lyrics we can help them listen with discernment. Here’s five guidelines to follow that will help you influence what your child is hearing:

Control the Music That Comes Into Your Home

As a parent, you wouldn’t allow your kids to watch an X-rated movie. Similarly, we shouldn’t turn a blind eye—or deaf ear—to the descriptions of pornographic acts set to the beat. We can’t control the music that gets made or even control what our child hears when they are out of the house. But we have the power and authority to control what comes into our homes.

Do Your Homework

For almost any song your child wants to listen to, you can go online and hear a sample and read the lyrics for free. Spend the time researching the artists and songs that capture their imagination so you can have an informed discussion about their musical preferences.

Don’t Settle for Shallow Justifications

Your child wants to fit in with the rest of culture, so be ready to hear every excuse imaginable for why they should listen to “worldly” music:

“I just like the beat, I’m not even paying attention to the lyrics.”

“But the singer is a Christian. They even thanked God at the Grammys.”

“Sure it contains bad language, but I hear worse from the kids at school.”

Don’t concede to such shallow justifications. Giving in to them won’t help your child become a more God-honoring believer.

Worry About Their Present Condition, Not Their Future Rebellion

When it comes to parenting, the most misused Bible verse is likely Proverbs 22:6: “Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.” Too many parents treat this verse as if it’s a promise attached to a command, rather than what it is—a proverb (i.e., a general truth).

But the verse is a proverb because it is generally true. If we start children off on the way they should go by limiting their exposure to unedifying music, they are indeed more likely to avoid such music when they are older. Too often, though, we are overly focused on future, potential rebellion. We worry that if we’re too strict in controlling what they listen to that when they get older they’ll rebel and listen to the music we forbid. Perhaps they will. But so what? Why should we allow their worldview to be corrupted now—at an age when they are most impressionable—simply to avoid their listening to the same kind of music when they are older.

Listen to Music Together

This can be the hardest advice to follow, especially if you do not share your teen’s musical taste. But listening to music together can help clarify for your child why certain songs are problematic. Remind them that if they are ashamed to listen to racy or violent music in your presence they should be even more concerned about listening to it in the presence of our holy God.